I think the answer is that one day you just get tired of fighting for something that's not going to happen--some process or feeling or state of being that only you notice is becoming casual and significant only because it is old. At that point, the fatigue is such that you welcome everything that comes with the new state of being. Giving up feels less like capitulation and more like an opportunity to turn to and value oneself. It's not sad. It just is.
So what is the question?