I've been thinking a lot about DJ.
I know it's good that he's independent, living on his own, and happy. Adam says DJ inherited my naturally happy genes. I'm not sure that's genetic. I love that I'm feeling the happy again. It's wonderful.
But I miss DJ. It's not like I don't see him--he comes over for dinner a few days weekly and he'll be going on a mini-vacation with me next month. It's just that he's not here anymore. I can't kiss him good-night, or make sure he's not eating junk food, or help him with his laundry, or listen when he needs to talk.
And I miss that.
I miss him.
I'm very good at letting people live their lives without me. I'm very bad at not missing them.
Missing them is part of life. I miss mine, too, but like you, find joy in their independence. It's interesting that just when they're at their best and most fun, its time for them to head into the world and find their own way. We're left with that regular phone call and occasional email, but even better, we have the satisfaction of knowing that in the end we didn't do such a bad job after all.
ReplyDeleteActually, DJ has never been anything but sunshine--probably why I miss him so much. I can count on one hand the number of times we've argued. He's not perfect, by any means, but he's always brought pure joy. Still does. :-)
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