Lunch Break Post

No classes to teach this semester, only private students and accompanying. My continuing education is finished and I'm ready for the tax season. My online work continues to be plentiful. I'm set for another four months of 12- to 16-hour workdays. I would complain about the workload, but it feels normal now so there's really nothing to complain about.

My father-in-law continues to waffle about selling his home. It's a condition we placed before Darrin and I would take up housekeeping with him. We will share a home. We will not live in his home. We will share expenses.

As the only unemployed person (hoping fervently that Darrin will have a job), he will be expected to help with the housework. Not all of it. He is, after all, in his 80s and a stroke survivor. But it will not be my job. I have a job. I have many jobs. I cannot be the maid simply because I am female. Some days he remembers.

We will make sure that he has help with his needs. We will also make sure the he is allowed to be independent as long as possible. My father-in-law estimates he will live two or three more years. I believe, once he is away from the toxic environment in which he has lived for the past decade, it will be more like ten or fifteen years.

I have hit a point on non-negotiation. We set the terms. He agreed to them. It's important that he understands that once the boundaries are in place, I expect them to be honored. Otherwise there will be no Samantha in the cohabitation situation. We'll see what happens. My father-in-law returns from the Dominican Republic in a couple of weeks.

I don't feel sad anymore - or depressed - or suicidal. This is good. Except I pretty much don't feel anything anymore. Also good, I think, for now. Therapist has suggested returning to regular therapy in March. I've agreed, contingent on Darrin's procurement of a job with insurance benefits, or my ability to make enough money to cover our living expensed plus health insurance. Thus far, we have gone without for six months. That can't continue much longer. But the thought of adding more hours or another job is a little bit daunting to me. Darrin and I are currently discussing different possibilities on our present income.

And now my lunch break is done.