If we will be quiet and ready enough, we shall find compensation in every disappointment.
~Henry David Thoreau
But...
Sometimes we don't really wish for compensation. We want to rage and cry. We want to fantasize that the disappointment never happened, or that we can make it go away. We want to be held and comforted, but never pitied. We want to forget.
But...
After years of trying the other things...weeping...feeling used...wishing life was different...wanting what I cannot have...silently screaming...
I am finally quiet.
But...
I'm not sure I'm ready quite yet to look for the compensation within the disappointment. I think, for a moment, I'll just let everything rest. Tomorrow I'll have the strength to acknowledge my blessings with gratitude. Just...not today.
Sounds good to me. But thanks for not being silent on gmail chat. I don't eat blue food either. Well, except M&M's.
ReplyDelete