Why are men so aggravating?

My kids are back in school. They seem to have forgotten that the only reason I gave them life was so I'd have friends at home to play with. Children are so unreliable.

Darrin and I talked last night. I told him that as long as he refused to see a doctor, take medication, change his eating habits, or exercise, his death was a real possibility and we needed to make some plans for that event. His response was to point out that his triglycerides were lower than they'd been in years, which is true. However, the high threshold of acceptable is 149 mg/dL. His reading is 384 mg/dL. That's more than double the acceptable high. Add to that the fact that his liver function is not good, his thyroid stimulation hormone is much too high, his glucose levels aren't healthy, and he has sleep apnea--Darrin is a heart attack waiting to happen.

Darrin is concerned about expense--and that's valid. We don't have insurance and the cost of doctors, prescriptions, CPAP machine, and other things would eat up half my monthly salary. I looked into private health insurance recently. The premium for Darrin rivals his actual health care costs AND we would have to pay for a deductible and co-insurance on top of that. In short, the insurance costs more than no insurance, except if Darrin ever did have a major medical disaster (which he probably will), then the insurance would be worth it.

Darrin said he didn't want to talk about it. I said I didn't care.

We tossed ideas around. The obvious solution is for Darrin to lose forty pounds and start moderate exercise. It sounds easy. But the conglomeration of health problems he's hosting is slowing his metabolic rate, making him feel tired all the time, which also seems to trigger the need to eat constantly. I don't understand this. I can go days without wanting to eat, and exercise is something I need. But these things are real setbacks for Darrin and I don't know how to help him. I prepare healthy meals with lots of fruits and vegetables and very little fat, and he goes to the store to buy and consume a pound of French bread, or stashes chips in his car, or runs out for fast food on his lunch break. He says he craves carbs and fat. My research backs this up. The thyroid and sleep problems really do trigger his desire for carbs, especially high fat/high salt ones.

In the end, we agreed to nothing and Darrin fell asleep. I honestly do not know how to solve this problem and I desperately don't want to be a widow at my age...well, at any age, really.

Sigh...

Okay--going to run. I think today looks like it will be sunny and beautiful.