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Saturday, January 5, 2008

And since I'm feeling like myself again...

To the amazingly closed-minded person speaking in the guise of gay rights:

1. You're right. Eating disorders are a little bit stupid, and they certainly do attract attention, especially when the person dies. I'm not intending to die, myself, and have complete confidence that I'll figure everything out. Whether I could actually afford to lose a few pounds is not something I'll discuss with you--or anyone else, for that matter. Let's just say I don't know you and you don't know me but I'm pretty happy with my size and I'd rather not get much smaller.

2. I have the greatest amazement when people like you believe you can speak for every person within a subgroup. Being married under any condition is a fairly personal decision. The fact that I chose a man is really a moot point, since a woman and I would be unable to be married. I actually don't consider myself a menace to gay people everywhere, nor do I consider that by marrying a man I've done a disservice to lesbians everywhere. Actually, when you figure out the percentage of people living on earth today who are even aware of my marriage, I don't think it figures into any equation. So, given those statistics, I think I'll just stay with my man. But thanks for your concern.

3. Wow. Having admitted that you, yourself, have never experienced heterosexual copulation, it seems a bit presumptuous that you'd insist there is no way I can possibly enjoy it. However, I am unabashed about discussing any part of human physiology, reproduction, or sexual acts, so I'm happy to set you straight about the parts of sex I find enjoyable. Truly--it doesn't embarrass me. Just the other day TB and I were discussing the female menstrual cycle and anatomy and it was no big deal, and Sully, DJ and I were talking a couple of days ago about foreskin regrowth (among other things), and AtP and I have discussed more than once breast reductions/augmentations. After all--our bodies are fascinating and I think everyone should be able to talk about them in some context. So please, allow me to dispel your disbelief. There's nothing I'd enjoy more...

To the freakishly scary religious zealot:

1. Please--pull your head out. I've been completely open when I've discussed religious topics and each time I've made certain to point out that my opinions are my own. The most amazing privilege in the world, to me, is that I can hear what is said in conferences and from the pulpit, and then I'm given agency to decide if I believe it's true. And it doesn't make me a "bad" member of the the church if I believe the church isn't perfect and that the men who lead it sometimes give incorrect opinions/information. After all, the prophet Joseph Fielding Smith said we'd never see the day that a man would walk on the moon--and it happened in his lifetime. I'm fairly certain that if the church leaders have had the opportunities to be tested that we all have had (and it would be unfair to them if they weren't), they've been wrong more than once, and they'll continue to make mistakes because they're human. Some of those mistakes will affect church policy and leadership, no doubt. Then we'll all have the opportunity to learn about forgiveness and human frailty. So....yes, I plan to continue preaching the gospel according to Samantha. To do otherwise, in my opinion, would make me a slothful and unwise steward.

2. Yes, I really am a Young Women Leader. And if you're serious about contacting my bishop and letting him know I'm gay...well...I hate to burst your bubble...but he already knows. Not only that, but he has a daughter in my class and another will be joining us soon. As for letting the Stake President know...yeah...too late on that one, as well. If I had known that tattling brings you such pleasure I would have waited and let you tell them, but I had no idea that anyone would care as much as you seem to. Let's see...I don't think my Relief Society president knows, though. Would you like to tell her?

3. Here's the thing: one day you'll grow up and realize that the things you've clung to really aren't truths--they're traditions. And while traditions can serve a purpose, sometimes they are unhealthy, promote incorrect beliefs, or are just plain stupid. And at the core of the gospel of Jesus Christ is love for mankind. I have difficulty believing that Christ would call me a heretic for exercising the mind I've been blessed with, for striving to find real truth, and for sharing my beliefs with others (and I think he liked my birthday post to him--really--I do). I'm certain that he would never threaten to tell my bishop that my natural inclination is to fall in love with women, nor would he try to isolate me from young women or women, in general. In fact, I'm sure that he loves me--imperfect, gay, insecure, sinful me. And even though sometimes it's really difficult, I want to love others as he loves. And so--bottom line--I forgive you for being ignorant and challenge you to find out more about your fellowman instead of assigning us to live in hell. Last time I checked, that was someone else's job. Come on...deep down really love me...I'm know you do...let's hug....


  1. It's always surprising to me that there are still people in the world who think gay means "child molester." Or that being gay means you always fall head over heals for EVERYone of your own gender—regardless of age or whether or not they're your "type."

    I had two gal friends in high school who were naturally very thin (one who, to this day, is doing her damnedest to gain a few pounds). They got chewed out and yelled at by people who thought they were self-centered. How do people think that yelling at someone is going to make them get better? And, it's not a matter of being vain, even if it IS because that person thinks she's fat, it's a matter of a skewed view of herself which no amount of yelling will change.


    Samantha, I'm impressed you allow yourself to be open to people like this after you get so many crazy/horrible emails. I don't know if I would have the personal strength to do it, and you do it so well.

  2. I am sorry people send you such rude emails. I admire your ability to tell others off without being mean about it. That is a talent I'd like to have because I don't think I could have taken their rudeness with such grace. -A.J.

  3. Hey, comments are back!

    I just wanted to tell you you're fabulous.

  4. JB: Most of the time I don't really worry about emails sent by people too cowardly to post in the comments section (under the guise of "what I have to say is to lengthy for a comment, so I'm emailing"), however, these happened to come when the timing was bad. Usually, if it seems to me that the person is trying to be demeaning in private, that's when I air what was said by him/her publicly. It's rather pointless for me to do so, since they rarely visit more than once, do their cursory exploration of the blog, say stupid things in an email and leave. But one can always hope they'll get it someday...

    A: Thanks for your kind words. I hope you'll keep visiting and talking.

    Mister Fob: As are you--and it was very fun to see you at Christmas time. Still waiting for that game of Scrabble...

  5. .

    Wow! I had no idea you were so dangerous!

  6. You know, even if people with eating disorders *were* doing for attention (which I don't believe), why would it be such a bad thing to give them some? They're clearly hurting.

    [Now I'm being redundant. Oh well.]